A woman reunited with herself...

This morning I woke up and realized that I cannot remember the last time I actually took the time to relax and just be....

I suppose it all started with general boredom, but somehow as life progresses with this frantic need for constant entertainment, you tend to lose focus on yourself amidst the whirl of friends, going out, parties, game nights, gossip and sometimes arguments and drama..

Now for those of you who are wondering what's happened now, nothing really triggered this off.. It's just that I believe that even your soul has a voice, and if you go long enough without paying attention to yourself, you start feeling it crying out for attention and time..

I've found that from the moment I wake up in the morning to the moment I'm falling asleep at night, my every thought is centered around someone else and I'm not talking about this in an altruistic way. I mean that while my thoughts may be connected to me, they are also so intertwined with what someone else may have said, thought, suggested, what they may think of me, why they haven't done something, why they did something, whether they're annoyed at me, whether i'm reading too much into a look or a face or a situation, whether we're getting on each others nerves..And these are normal, everyday human thoughts that just flit through your mind, and become a part of your conversation and a part of your life before you realize the toll they're taking on you. I think the reason that we don't feel the weight of our thoughts is because they're spread out over the many people that you care about and come in contact with in an average day.

Well today, I woke up, made myself a cup of tea, stood in a small patch of sunlight on my balcony and took a deep breath and just enjoyed the moment of absolute silence.. and it's as simple as that.. It's not that I forgot who I was or lost myself.. I just forgot to pay attention to myself.. beyond the obvious taking care of my food, water, clothing and shelter.. I forgot to give my self some peace and quiet, I wrote off spending time alone as boring, I stopped pampering myself with long showers and music in the back ground, and walks in the sun, and shopping for good, decent books to read. I forgot that friends and family while I love them, do need time apart from each other to keep things good, and most importantly, whether you like it or not.. I forgot that familiarity will breed contempt.